Thanks to Angie for lending me this book. It's hilarious and I'm truly rooting for Anna.K, what more can I say?

Minus the 5000-visitors-a-day part, I'm just another Anna K. Insecure, lonely, trapped, finding refuge in fabricating stories and fantasies on the Internet, pretending that they're all real.

It's not that what I've written here is entirely fabrication. Well in fact, I do treat this thingy as a journal. Entries here are records of my life and my feelings, they are mostly genuine. If I have to fabricate anything, it'll go to my writing project Fabrication. But somehow it's interesting to read what I've written so far here, looking at my life from the readers' point of view. I couldn't help but think, am I writing for the sake of myself or for the purpose to get approval from the unknown readers on the Internet?

Blogging has always been paradoxical. On one hand, you wanna protect your privacy that you find it scary, when some unknown person leave comments saying that they disagree with you, on the other hand, you want attention that you feel lonely when you find "no reply" at the bottom of the entry, which you regard as "thought-provoking".

It's funny how once I read a Xanga with an entry saying that "please respect my privacy, this is only open for my friends". The sentence itself is a manifestation of the paradox of the whole blogging thing. I thought the Xanga owner will have the nerve to close the whole Xanga down or protect all her entries right after such declaration. Yet some time later, I visited her Xanga again, and it's packed with details of her personal life.

A battle between craving for attention and defense of one's privacy.

Well blogging is interactive too, you addict to writing your own blog and to reading others' blogs as well. Is it communication? Is it a way to bring people closer to each other? I'm not sure. After all, how much truth do we disclose online? and how much do you trust a person who judges you base on your blog which is sometimes inevitably one-sided?

I'm all up for the blogging thing as long as it's not taken too seriously. It's just an emotional outlet where you can actually get some responses and sometimes it does help to remedy your loneliness.Worrying about stalkers? In fact I think if you ignore them, they won't do more than hacking your computer. They only get dangerous if you give them enough amount of attention (and someitmes you just love it when someone says "oh wow I love your entries, I feel the same as you do, I can be your best friend").

Okay so I guess this is thought-provoking enough, give me comment, save a lonely teenager girl who's got

nothing better to do here.

Love until later,

Christy L